In life, there are questions that never get answered.
I know I have scores of questions that will follow me to the wherever after, and I’m plenty fine with that. Because I’ve always been a believer that not all questions are meant to be answered. Certain questions are simply meant to provoke us into moving forward.
Mind you, I’ve also got a great big pile of questions that possess not a lick of import as per the grand scheme of things. It’s in keeping with my personality. I don’t get all caught up in the big deal stuff like Why are we here? because I think it’s a bacon cheeseburger cliche of a question, and I’ve never been a traditional wanderer.
Here’s a sampling of that great big pile . . .
- Has my son ever picked up a vacuum cleaner in his life?
- Are chips and dip considered a meal? And if not, why?
- Is Kelly Ripa a Dementor?
- Why do we name certain inanimate objects but not others?
- Is it wrong to call an inanimate object a fucking piece of shit hijo de puta? (When it doesn’t do what I want it to do?)
- Was Mary Hart ever a real person? Please tell me she wasn’t . . .
- Is it wrong to miss pain pills every time I hear certain love songs?
- Why did I watch television before remote controls?
- Will Domino’s Pizza be fixing potholes with their pizzas?
- Was God paying attention when I voted for Bill Murray?
As you can see, my questions are simple ones. That’s because I thrive on spatial integrity as far as me ‘noggin is concerned. Sure there’s a value to being in tune with one’s self, but you best wear a harness so’s you don’t plummet into the deep. Because there is an abyss to which most of our brains are not equipped to navigate without some third party involvement making the scene. Trust me on this.
Keep things simple, kids.