This week’s Heroes post is an abbreviated version on account of the government shut down. See, not all services are running at full capacity. And that includes yours truly, who is a tad bit under the weather. I didn’t number my top five, since there is no particular order to ’em anyways.
Let’s go weekend!
A bulldog and a steer walk into a bar: College football has never been confused with the Mensa society. It’s a minor league football league where academics are a suggestion, not a prerequisite. Of course, this fact makes it fun as hell to watch. And not simply because of the play on the field.
Prior to Monday night’s Sugar Bowl tilt between Georgia and Texas, a meeting of the mascots was organized. Georgia brought out its mascot Uga while Texas trotted out Bevo. One problem. Uga is an English bulldog and Bevo is a steer. And, oh yeah . . . they’re real. What in the blessed fuck did the thumbtacks who planned this meeting think this was going to happen? At the very least, put bumpers on those fucking horns! Uga is the only one with sense in this entire episode. She was like Fuck this! Stubs don’t fail me now . . I am outta here!
Win or Lose, DeAndre Hopkins is a Champion: Fret not, because not all Texans wear wear ten gallon hats to hide their ten cent brains. Take DeAndre Hopkins for example. The Houston Texans star wide receiver is donating his game check to the family of 7 year old Jazmine Barnes, who was killed on Sunday in a random shooting. The donation will help cover funeral expenses as well as assist in the search for the killer. It’s worth noting that for every bad act in professional sports, there are way more good guys like Hopkins.
Super Size This!: Okay, I got turned on by this video just a little bit. But lemme ‘splain. The female in this video defended herself and then some, so all’s well that ended in a TKO. Yasmine James has attitude and game . . how can you NOT dig her?
She best not be fired. Listen, I get it . . the optics aren’t ideal when an employee is laying a beat down on a customer. But the only time I grimaced during this video is when those piping hot french fries fell off the counter. James kicked the shit out of this guy, and guess what? He fucking deserved it.
Man of Steel . . . Umm, No: Trump’s campaign promise for a concrete wall, paid for by Mexico has turned into a steel wall paid for by American taxpayers. He’s claiming the government shutdown is a conspired effort by Democrats to win the White House in 2020. He’s pulling stunts in the White House briefing room. Basically, he sounds just like this guy.
So props to CNN reporter Kaitlan Collins, who refused to play the Mystery Woman from that Blues Brothers flick. All Trump could do was offer a fake response to a real news reporter’s line of questioning. Shocker.
President Tom Kirkman Returns: The show Designated Survivor will be returning for a third season, leaving ABC for Netflix. And what am I doing tucking this four month old story into my Heroes of the week post? Welp, as far as I’m concerned, the government shutdown ends as soon as Kiefer Sutherland strolls into the Oval Office. Trump voters can have their fake President.
I’ll have the real deal.