sorryless

Heroes Of The Week!

Sorryless39 Comments

Laurie Jupiter

The quick shots episode #21 was so popular (with me) that I’ve decided to adopt this fortuitous fling going forward. I’ve got a full on 100 percent Heroes post coming up at some future point, and I’ll probably have a battle of the sexes Heroes post as well. Since sexes don’t battle any more, they just scream and holler.

Pols, jocks and celebs only posts might happen, but I’m not sold on it yet. A throwback Heroes post is very much in the mix, though . . as soon as I find my time traveler kicks. An all kids Heroes post? Never. An all fifty or older Heroes post? Definitely.

Let’s get to stepping.

Clown Sign

Something is afoot in Oakland- So last week, Antonio Brown made this space for his frozen feet. This week, he threatened to retire if he couldn’t use his original helmet design rather than an updated version. It was a transparent attempt to buy some time for his blistered dogs. Next week, AB will make this space when he sues Cleveland for using his last name.

Trump at the Catskills back for 144th week- 45 got into it with CNN’s Chris Cuomo after a video of the news anchor losing his cool went viral. Cuomo went off on a man who called him “Fredo”, and the Trump campaign was there to pick up the pieces. And turn them into a merch moment by selling “Fredo Unhinged” t-shirts for $34 on its website. Cuomo apologized for the meltdown but this didn’t stop Trump from tossing in a “red flag” joke about the incident. How can a President have more free time for social media than a middle school teenager?

I don’t know who Andrew Yang is, but I do know he gives the Democrats a candidate from every state now, right?

Tiger Shark Mama- Miranda Perez is reason #5,613 why not everyone should have kids. She threatened to shoot up Barton Elementary School in Lake Worth, Florida when her kids were transferred there as the result of a school board resolution looking to address overcrowding. I guess it could have been worse. She might have decided to home school them.

Vera

Soulful harvest- Larry Yockey is a fourth generation farmer from Ritzville, Washington. In February of this past year, he was diagnosed with Stage 4 cancer. The chances that he would be able to harvest a wheat field which was his only source of income while undergoing treatment weren’t good. When word of his plight spread, neighbors, farmers and volunteers showed up to harvest his fields for him. They finished a three week job in eight hours. Yockey’s daughters intend on making this a fifth generation enterprise; thanks to the lessons of their father, and a little help from their friends.

Kandi’s Gentleman’s Club in Omaha, Nebraska is looking for stay at home moms who want to earn some extra cash. No word as to whether daycare is provided.

No tea party- The mother/son team of Carol and Scott Dawson are The South Yorkshire, England branch of the Manson family. They shot Gary Dean, a marathon runner, with an air rifle over a dispute over the use of their footpath. Then they beat Dean to death with tree branches and stones. Proving that America ain’t cornered the market on fucked up peeps.

Twenty five years ago this week, Major League Baseball went on strike. It led to the cancellation of the World Series for the first time in 90 years. Bud Selig and his pals would make up for it a few years later with an artificially enhanced home run chase that ushered in the steroids era. Sacred records would fall, player salaries would skyrocket and new ballparks would be built on a lie. With the fans who’d been screwed out of a World Series footing the bill. And to think, they keep Shoeless Joe out of the Hall . . .

Random act of beauty- Lamiyah Jabbar is an Uber driver by day, but an angel the rest of the time. Christmas came early for one financially strapped passenger who shared her checklist wishes with Jabbar. “Can you imagine waiting till Christmas just to get a robe, house shoes and a outfit for church?” Said Jabbar. “We tend to take things for granted, but why not help someone else if you can?” So she gifted the woman a new dress and a $50 Visa gift card for the robe and shoes. That’s just how she rolls.

Now that Jay-Z has teamed up with the NFL, Colin Kaepernick has his last best chance at making an NFL roster. I think the Eagles would work just fine.

Good medicine- 17 year old Micah Wooten had just completed three months of boot camp at Parris Island and was on the cusp of fulfilling his dream of becoming a U.S. Marine, when he was rushed to Beaufort Memorial Hospital for surgery. His condition wasn’t life threatening, but it did cost him the chance to stand with his fellow cadets at the graduation ceremony.

Laurie Harvey, who is an R.N. and the assistant director of the OR at Beaufort Memorial wasn’t going to take the unfortunate turn of events for the kid sitting down. “My heart just broke for him,” said Laurie. “We can’t let this day end this way.”

And so Laurie and her co-workers arranged a graduation ceremony for Wooten. She lined up all the physicians and nurses in attendance along the walls outside of the operating room. And when Micah was wheeled out in his hospital bed, the Marine Corps hymn began to play.

Micah will be back at it before too long, after which he will begin living out his dream. He’ll take along a poem gifted him by the Beaufort staff titled “Don’t Quit”, and a stone cross by which to remember his impromptu graduation. Heartfelt reminders that what he’ll do in service to his country will never be forgotten by the people of a United States. We are always supportive, always thankful . . .

Always faithful.

39 thoughts on “Heroes Of The Week!”

    • That sign was sent to me, it’s a classic, LOL.

      As for the T-man, I was asked a little while back why it was I never mentioned him in one of my Heroes posts. I explained that he, like Antonio Brown, is constantly providing fodder. He really could be in an episode every single week with all the stupid shit he does. But Imma give it a break, because it becomes tired. And our long, national nightmare is tired enough as it is.

      Liked by 1 person

  2. B,

    Popular with all your peeps 😉 100% Heroes or battle of the sexes, definitely will be food.
    Look forward to whatever you come up with.

    Buahaha! Sue the Browns for stealing his name… what a putz.

    Fredo Unhinged… aye aye aye… I don’t understand how this prez has so much time on his hands…

    Good fucking grief! Bravo Perez. Poor kids.

    What a beautiful story that farmer one is. I love that all those peeps came to his aid. Ever notice it’s never the rich that come to aid?

    Ha ha ha! Earn extra cash, lock up your kids, first.

    Jeezus. The Dawsons really don’t like trespassers, eh?

    Sad state of affairs that baseball strike. Killed us.

    Shout out to Lamiyah Jabbar! What a lovely lady.

    Your Micah Wooten story is similar to my 50 – yes FIFTY year old friend who joined the Canadian Army and broke her foot one week before graduation. She had to wait months to join a new group to finish up. Micah’s turn will come. In the meantime, that was a nice thing for the hospital staff to do.

    Great voice on that Toby Lightman! Where do you find these gems? She reminds me a little of Joss Stone.

    Excellent, as per.

    Q

    Like

    • Q,

      There are so many ways I can go with these Heroes post. It’s comedy gold, I tell you! Gold! LOL.

      As soon as I posted this, I read that some fan is suing HIM. Most likely for being a putz.

      Cuomo lost it, and that was his bad considering he was with his kids. However, I don’t know that any self respecting guy wouldn’t have done the same thing if some asshole was calling them “Fredo” inside that moment. He apologized, and no less a polar opposite foe than Sean Hannity actually came to Cuomo’s defense and said he had nothing to apologize for. I kind of agree, when you put the whole thing in context. He was pissed, a natural reaction.

      Like I said, it could have been worse. If Perez was home schooling these kids, there’s no telling what they would have been taught, and shown. THEY might have become shooters. What a mess of a mom.

      The farmers have been getting screwed royally, so yeah, they know all about sticking together.

      Strip club owners are such insular beings. They really don’t have any idea as to how their shit comes across to the rest of us.

      The Dawsons are proof positive that good fences make good neighbors. But in their case, make sure the fence is twelve feet high, with barbed wire lining the top.

      To think the owners and Bud Selig learned nothing. Or maybe they DID learn something, the wrong thing. Because they sold the fans a bill of goods. Not to mention, they killed baseball in a city. How ironic too, considering they’re always chatting up how to make the game more global. They HAD a team in another country and they fucked it up!

      Jabbar for the WIN!

      Fifty?! THAT is impressive! And yes, Wooten will be living his dream, buoyed by a hospital staff that went above and beyond.

      Very much like Joss Stone. Toby has been around for a long time, but she is one of those musical artists that never really “broke through”. But great pipes.

      ‘Precciate it! 🙂

      B

      Liked by 1 person

      • It is! 😉

        Irony at its best.

        Only trouble with being pissed when you are a public figure, is you are not allowed to truly show it without it being thrown back in your face. I am ever so thankful I am nobody!

        Right. Now these kids have a small chance of not taking after Mum.

        I was just listening to the news and our farmers are totally getting shafted too.

        Strip club owners are in their own little world.

        They are! And yeah… maybe make them electrical but only from the inside.

        They did! And it wasn’t a bad team either! Sigh.

        Go Jabbar!

        Yep! Crazy broad. She joins her husband and eldest… And Wooten will.

        Great pipes.

        🙂

        Like

        • Antonio Brown is a walking punchline. Welp, at least the Raiders will never be accused of being boring.

          Me too! I would be in big trouble otherwise. HUGE trouble!

          Thank God. Why is it that so many parents behave like circus clowns?

          None of this is any of Trump’s doing, of course. He’s . . . umm . . perfect.

          I guess you have to be if your whole life is devoted to decisions like whether or not to have the girls use pasties while they dance.

          Fuck it, yes. And have a moat on your side of the fence. With gators. And then have landmines lining the precipice of the moat . . and then . . .

          It was a great team. The idea of a Montreal vs New York World Series would have been incredible. Traditional vs New Age, one country pitted against another for what would have been the third year in a row when you consider that Toronto had gone back to back the two years prior. That series would have had it all.

          How great was her gesture, really. Hopefully, her Uber business prospers.

          Crazy broad who did something special.

          😉

          Liked by 1 person

          • I always did like the Raiders 😉

            I just feel for the kids who realize their family situation is not normal…

            He’s something all right. Perfect is not the word I would personally use.

            I guess…

            Hah! Yes! Funny you should mention landmiines – I was watching Fear and there is a situation… woman and son stuck in house and all around are the mines hubby – who, of course does not live to return – planted.

            It was a great team. Sigh.

            I hope it does for her as well. Course, if she keeps being so generous she might find herself the one in need!

            She did!

            Like

          • Classic team. Too bad they’ve been hot garbage for the past couple decades.

            In cases like this, it’s a small miracle when the kids don’t wind up in therapy or much worse. Gawd.

            It’s probably not the word anyone would use. Other than him.

            That’s something these zombie flicks and shows haven’t really covered all that much. Devices like land mines would be everywhere, I would think. AND mosquitoes.

            They made it Mon-real. For a time anyways.

            Buahahaha! This is true.

            Liked by 1 person

          • Too true. I was a fan waaaaay back when.

            Oh yeah. Sadly, they just continue the circle in most cases.

            Of course he would!

            It was something to see. Those walkers popping like bloody popcorn! Considering where they are shooting this, why are skeeters not part of the scenario?

            For a time.

            Right?

            Like

          • At least the uniform is still cool.

            How can they not? It’s their whole world?

            Putz.

            I just don’t understand how mosquitoes don’t play a role in these stories. And really, it could be a pretty insidious angle to use, considering they might carry the virus.

            Then MLB and Selig fucked ’em over.

            So true!

            Liked by 1 person

          • There is that.

            Sadly.

            Totally.

            Gawd almighty… It’s already in the air, what’s a little skeeter bite gonna do… (no use of sarcasm was detected)

            Royally.

            🙂

            Liked by 1 person

  3. Super post, Pilgrim.
    A B is going to be good for a whole season of laughs
    Fredo should have told everyone to f–k off. So he’s no Cordilone. So he made a mistake. Hmmm, maybe he should f–k off. Perez needs to be read her rights. Great Farmer tale. Work at home? House calls? EEEK. The Dawsons have caused the local government to outlaw sticks and stones. Bud Selig sounds like a craft beer. Lamiyah Jabbar is a saint. Micah Wooten deserved nothing less. Great job, Marc.

    Liked by 1 person

    • AB is a reality show unto himself.

      Cuomo had a moment, it happens. The funny thing is, Trump is making light of someone blowing a gasket. That’s rich.

      The fact that Perez has kids is frightening.

      That farmer story really is good stuff.

      It reminds me of the last time I was in Atlanta- many moons ago. I called down to the front desk to ask them where a certain well known strip club was in proximity to the hotel. They informed me the strip club had closed. So I hung up only to get a phone call , from the front desk. Dude wanted to know if he could arrange for someone to come visit my room. I said thanks but no thanks, LOL.

      This is true, Boss.

      It does kind of sound like a craft beer. A really shitty one.

      Jabbar is an Uber Saint.

      I agree on Wooten.

      Thank you Sheriff. Happy Friday!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. The New York Post that also should take its act on the road, ran a front page of the the Cuomos as the Corleones. It was pretty funny.

    And you’re right, our 49th President watches much too much TV and social media. Nothing like running the country by phone.

    I’ll bet Melania is sleeping in the Lincoln Bedroom with a giant lock on the door.

    Liked by 1 person

  5. Just watched The Commuter and thought about you. Oh my goodness. Your girlfriend is a bada$$ (in a good way). She made Liam look good.

    45 only watches TV, Tweets and practices being vile in the mirror. Why won’t he just goooooo away??

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Go for the juggler! Ha! That was so great 😉 I was laughing on that after a long day that one right there did it for me. The Tiger Shark mama DUDE … there are people totally out there like this. But I was glad to read on ahead and find the acts of kindness heartwarming The Soulful Harvest and Uber driver. Man that was pretty good stuff. Thanks for sharing:)

    Liked by 1 person

    • Buahahaha! I love that sign!

      Don’t I know it. Tiger Shark Mamas are not uncommon. And neither are those Papas.

      Acts of kindness in a not always so kind world, it keeps us solid.

      Thank YOU Cali.

      Like

Comments are closed.