Goodish Housekeeping

I was asked recently why I don’t blog more when I dish on WP. It was one of those questions I never thought about until it was pasted to the thin air above my head. I was busy tucking steam into my response when I just stopped in my tracks and declared Yahtzee.

The thing is, I don’t build a blog post or an article or an essay based on a definition. I just write the hell out of an idea, best I can. Sometimes it works for me and sometimes I’m not crazy about the finished product. Which is why I go back and do it again, because that’s what defines bloggers, writers, poets and peeps who jot down notes on cocktail napkins. A habit. It’s the only common theme that matters. Style is just details.

The question was posed in reference to my Heroes episodes, whose format borrows from something you’d find in a newspaper or magazine. As far as language is concerned, I primp my vowels and curl my consonants and celebrate the idea that words are fantastic beasts if you know how to feed them. My regard to keywords- the scrolls of blog establishmentarian- is woeful. But whereas certain real deal writers on WP offer up footnotes, I express lane it in blog-like fashion with hyperlinks. So I’m a hybrid, and judging by a lot of peeps I read . . it’s the new fashioned way.

So that’s why I refer to my Friday menu as episodes. Because they slice that middle ground like a hot knife through butter. And here are a few stories that were dropped from Heroes because they would’ve harshed the new mellow. . .

  • Twitter is where common sense goes to die, further proven by the Peloton mama drama that unfolded over the last week. A small minded army of twits took to chirping about this commercial recently. They called it ‘sexist’ and railed on about misogynist husbands and the death of feminism. Their first world vitriol comes from the fact the young woman in this commercial looks like a model, so she obviously doesn’t need a Peloton. Welp, I know a lot of great looking, athletic women who are gifted exercise equipment. Because they love it. Because it’s not just about being physically fit. So here I am, defending the Peloton Mamas and their Papas too. Because it’s a free fucking country and if you want to overspend for a stationary bike with Bluetooth? By all means . . do so. And thank you to Ryan Reynolds for his genius directing job in putting this latest moment of stupid to bed with such hilarious results. If the woman in his Aviation Gin commercial looks familiar, that’s because she’s the Peloton mama. Drop the mic perfect.
  • And just so we’re clear, not all exercise equipment supplies you with the desired results. Jane Slater is a Dallas Cowboys reporter who got more than she bargained for when her now very much an ex of a boyfriend gifted her a FitBit for Christmas last year. They synced up and motivated each other and everything was granola bars and rainbow shots. Until she couldn’t get get in touch with him one night and logged into her Fitbit to find his activity levels spiking . . at 4 am. Technology giveth and technology put him in her rear view mirror.
  • The Colin Kaepernick “Lose Job Fast!” workout has resulted in an NFL signing! For Jordan Veasey- one of the wide receivers who participated. You gotta love the fact that the kid gets another shot, even if it’s with the Washington Redskins. In the three years Kaep has been out of the league, 115 quarterbacks have been signed to contracts. And that doesn’t include draft picks and players re-signed or picked off practice squads. I looked over the list and found half a dozen players I’d take over Kaep, but I mostly found a lot of guys who are probably selling insurance as we speak. The NFL and its owners invited all the criticism on themselves by colluding against Kaep. I hope Veasey kneels during the anthem. Okay, maybe not . . he’d just be making it easy for the gutless owner.

Well that was fun! I might have to come up with a semi-regular episode for my misfits. And I promise you that I won’t define whatever it is I come up with.

That would be no fun at all.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

61 thoughts on “Goodish Housekeeping

  1. B,

    I love that we are discussing our blogs and how much we post and then this pops up in my inbox! Carazy how that happens. Yahtzee indeed.

    You just keep doing what you do so bloody well. I love how you take an idea and write the hell out of it. And it is admirable to keep going back until you are satisfied (ish). Matter of fact, you inspire me to always write better.

    You primp and curl and decorate and highlight and lowlight and prove to us that words are fantastic beasts when in your hands. There are keywords? That’s how much I worry about them as well. Your style is all you. Fuck establishment.

    And I told ya you’d find a forum for the snark – because that is always gonna fight to make an appearance 😉

    Oh. Em. Gee. Peeps have nothing better to do than bitch about. Everything. And if she had bought him the Peloton? Would that have been a bitchy thing to do as that would mean she doesn’t love her husband the way he is? Is giving your wife a KitchenAid stand mixer a horrible gift because it’s not personal? He should include an expensive (coz $300 on a mixer ain’t enough) piece of jewellery to make up for his lack. I say this because I received said mixer (with much joy, by the way) and my supposed friend said it was disgusting to give an appliance. He should have included some earrings or something. Uh, bitch? He gave me what I wanted. What’s it to you? Sorry… I ranted. I’m with Ryan Reynolds’ response! Soo funny. And yeah, people, get over yourselves.

    Lucky Jane. That her wonderful ex of a boyfriend wasn’t smart enough to “forget” his FitBit at home when he went out for extra-curricular activities. Saved her from extending her association with him. God almighty, people are stupid.

    Jeez. Talk about taking one for the team. Veasy gets a chance but Kaep doesn’t? Can they (NFL) please get over themselves? Why is it okay to give another chance to a wife-beater but not to a kneeler? Oh. Right. Probably why it’s okay to have blood and guts spewing all over the screen but show a pair of titties and the country is in an uproar. (Yours, not mine.)

    Yes, this was absolutely fun! I feel like I doubled your word-count!

    You keep it fun (and always keep including a perfect video).

    Q

    Liked by 1 person

    • Q,

      It was a conversation with a fella who I didn’t know still read me from all the way back in the FB days. He wants to blog and I told him he should be doing it.

      Yes. Cray. Cray. But . . of course we were! 😉

      I think that’s just it. Don’t be satisfied. That kid with the Ravens . . Jackson. He has a t-shirt I absolutely love. “Nobody Cares. Work Harder.” Which is basically saying, eliminate all the peripherals and just go to it.

      Mind you, there are establishments that don’t even realize they are establishments. They figure themselves as the antidote to such things, and yet they subscribe to the same checklists, reversing them up as if that makes it different.

      Snark. Which is different from sarcasm.

      Yeah but then you’d have someone railing on about how jewelry is such a surface oriented gift that objectifies women, LOL. And who’s to say the woman didn’t ASK her husband for one? And it’s funny, because I read the spot much differently. As in, it helped her get motivated . . and it had nothing to do with her physical makeup. It was more important than that. And here I am, defending a Peloton Mama! What’s the world coming to?!

      Ryan Reynolds for President.

      Cheaters never win. I only wish Jane would’ve been from Bronx so she might have given him a parting gift.

      Absofuckinglutely! The NFL forgives domestic abusers, gun outlaws, drug cheats, bounty players, child support scofflaws and dog killers. But don’t kneel for the anthem!

      I don’t know! LOL

      Tom Waits turned 69 yesterday. And here’s hoping for at least another 31 years of his stuff.

      B

      Liked by 1 person

      • Back in the FB days… like you quite all that long ago… It’s only been a few months 😉 However, excellent advice. I’ve told a member of the club who befriended me that he should write a blog because his posts on FB are blog-worthy. He doesn’t even know what a blog is…. oh well.

        And yes, Of course we were!

        It’s when you are satisfied that you stop growing (keep your thoughts clean) and I saw that t-shirt! Love it.

        Hmm… You probably have a point on that one. Either way, I don’t subscribe to checklists.

        Oh, absolutely. A cousin, if you will…

        You can’t win. And yes, if one asks another what he/she wants and then said one supplies it, isn’t that a good thing? He/she listened? And yes… giving her the gift to keep her motivated is not a bad thing. Good for you on not allowing society to dictate how you feel!

        Sorry, hun, can’t. He’s OURS, remember? You guys have those rules about being a born-‘Murican and all that…

        They don’t. They think they do, but they don’t. It woulda been nice to let him have it. But she did. Have his walking papers and no blood on her hands.

        Bass-ackwards are the NFL. That’s all I can say. We can discuss this ’til we’re blue in the face, apoplectic and beside ourselves – won’t mean a damn thing.

        I suppose I could check. But that would take the effort I do not feel like taking right now 😉 But it must be close 😀

        He’s one of those singers that I have to be in a mood for. But yes. Happy birthday, Tom! May you have at least another 31 years…

        Liked by 1 person

        • Most peeps don’t know the blogosphere, still. It’s like this well hidden in your face secret that gets lost inside all the many tentacles of social media.

          Duh! LOL

          I didn’t have a tawdry thought in my head until you mentioned it. 😉

          And yes, that shirt is a favorite.

          Checklists are fine for grocery shopping.

          I will.

          Why do the self professed “open minded” individuals seem to be so closed minded on this stuff?

          Oh crap, him too?!

          Yeah I guess. Not worth going to jail for. But maybe get yourself a Luca Brasi and . . okay, never mind.

          The owners took risks to get there. After which they tucked tail and went along with the other guys.

          It is probably lots. I’ll check.

          He’s a different cat, that’s for sure.

          Liked by 1 person

  2. Dear Marco,

    OMG. I’m so sick of hearing the Peleton mishegoss. I, for one, find it feasible that the model wife wanted the exercise equipment to stay in tip top condition. Get a life, people. Are we that bored as a society that a two minute (or however long it is) commercial has the internet blowing up? Next thing you know someone will tweet about the racy commercial for KFC waffle and chicken with Colonel Sanders and Mrs. Butterworth.
    As for Twitter, I’m working on increasing my following at the suggestion of my new agent who says that publishers (the biggies) are obsessed with Twitter. Truthfully, I question it, but if I can make a connection I’m not against it.
    The fit bit story I didn’t know of because I avoid as many of those stories as humanly possible. However it’s priceless.
    I totally loved this post. Keep up the good work my word-bending, adjective-curling and noun-crafting friend.

    In a word, shalom from a fellow logophile,

    Rochelle

    Liked by 1 person

    • Just you wait, old Colonel Sanders will be next. They’re gonna say he’s a sexist pig who believes a woman’s place is in the kitchen.

      Twitter gets a bad rap because of all the nonsense that goes on there. But it’s like anything else in that it’s not the bad thing people make it into. And if it can be useful? Why wouldn’t you?

      I couldn’t believe that FitBit story. She has a good attitude about it, but really, that would suck.

      Gracias! I will. 🙂

      Logophile goes IN my word file!

      Like

  3. the insurance gig for many NFLers – reminds that we always say the NFL means NOT FOR LONG
    and speaking of that – was surprised to see Eli back on the field last night…

    re: Peloton
    agree – free country and so what if she was fit when she got it – we work out for stress release and heart health too – oh my goodness people sometimes get carried away – eh?
    and I guess it is good for business tho – look how many people are talking about that brand
    kind of like when the Buick suv commercial with Matthew McConaughey got made of fun of and even made it into a SNL skit – that is all good for business – eh?

    Liked by 1 person

    • I never fault a player for trying to get as much money as he can get, because yeah, it’s a short lived career for so many of them.

      The kid the Giants have got hurt, so Eli gets a last hurrah.

      Eggsactly! I love to make snarky remarks about Peloton Mamas, but Imma defend anyone who takes their health seriously- and yes, it ain’t just physical health as you say.

      McConaughey is out there, but he’s so damned interesting. And you’re right, any pub is good pub . . any attention is good attention. Peloton will have a very merry Christmas, I’m sure.

      Liked by 1 person

      • I am not a huge fan of the over-rated “McConaughey” – but thought the commercial was a good example of how ads can take on a new life –
        or as you say – The “attention” it gets

        RE: Peloton
        and the only issue I have with some of the workouts today – well my hubs biggest issue –
        is that people are sometimes doing wrong workouts when they only do cardio.
        They burn full and need lots and lots more fuel to keep that level going.
        and part of his “story” (that I witnessed) was he could not lose the weight he wanted to learn and for about 14 months he was doing too much cardio.
        He would walk the stairs to the Empire State building twice. He would do cardio for 70 minutes a day (and he was diligent) – and I would finsih a yoga class and he’d still be going – with not the best results.
        anyhow, he worked with a friend of his (Jason) health coach dude – and then went to “mark’s daily apple” where he found a bit of a home. 🙂
        anyhow, that is kind of what led him getting into being a part-time health coach – he is against the hype of all this cardio – and so when I see Peloton ads, well I have mixed feelings – not for the way they criticized the latest commercial – but for the overall approach some people have to working out these days might be “missing the mark”
        ((and we have an acquaintance who splurged on one of those bikes a few years ago and she has not reached her “body image” goal yet at all – another example of how all that cardio is not the answer – has value but is not the main thing)

        Liked by 1 person

        • He is out there, but I dig some of his stuff. He was great in Interstellar.

          This is true. I run and use a stationary bike- a regular old stationary bike. But I also do push ups and sit ups and stretching and breathing and weights.

          Liked by 1 person

          • Sounds like you have good workout variety!
            And I dig MM stuff too – same the “Lincoln lawyer” this year and it was so good –

            Have you seen the Irishman movie?
            I was disappointed with the writing – and the lots happening but not really anything happening

            Liked by 1 person

          • I do, 😉

            And the walking . . how goes that for you? I’ve missed two days, well. two days goal walking I mean.

            I dug the Lincoln Lawyer as well.

            I liked the Irishman, even if it took great liberties with the facts. For me, it was nice seeing DeNiro and Pesci with Pacino. This might very well be their last shared gig.

            Liked by 1 person

          • Hi – just thinking of you because I have a photo post coming with some pics from the walk –
            I missed a few days – but that was because I did so much walking to and from the places I had to go on some busy workdays – it would have been senseless to force a 20 minute walk – if that makes sense –
            thanks for asking bout it – and glad yours is going well..


            yes – that was the best part of the movie – seeing those actors together – a swan song so to speak – and all thanks to a rich company having money to pour into dreamy projects –
            and the way they aged people with make-up was well done –
            however, some in our circle were saying it was silly that they made old men (DiNero) look young (and not quite that young enough for the flashback to meeting his boss who helped him when his truck broke down – what was he supposed to look early 20s – nah) and then they had young guys trying to be old.
            __
            biggest recent comment was regarding Jesse Plemons (Todd from breading bad)
            now that guy right there should have been your main character for the Irish man – he looks Irish and could have done the aging process much better.
            — and seriously – an Italian man playing the Irish guy who merely buys a green casket – come on writers

            Liked by 1 person

          • I totally get it. No need for redundancy. You get your steps in when your steps ain’t happening so easily. I relate.

            Yanno, that was my problem with the movie too. Like, there are so many actors they could have chosen to play the younger version of these guys. Look at how they did Godfather 2, with DeNiro . . oh by the way. Yep, I agree with you on that one.

            The green casket was gaudy, I didn’t like it. LOL

            Liked by 1 person

          • 😊- if it wins awards I will wonder about the judges and if they were dazzled
            By star power and Filming equipment that made them see there was an anemic story line and terrible title

            Liked by 1 person

  4. Write the hell out of an idea…the habit of writing…. I know exactly what you mean, my man. You keep doing it, make it better, see it through to the end. I know it’s a detail, but I also really like your writing style. A lot of terrible writers out there. This is the good shit. Thanks – and talk soon!

    Liked by 1 person

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.