Sticks And Stones Ain’t Got Nothing On This

I recently decided to research the term “Karen” because as an avid fan of YouTube, you could say that I was compelled to deconstruct the mythological expression. You could say that, but this post was mostly just about killing some time. Check that, murdering it. So I consulted Wikipedia, because nothing says “I wanna broaden my horizons with the least amount of effort possible,” like a Wiki search. And man, did I get so much smarter . . I mean dumber. Both.

I learned that the term may have started on Black Twitter, and I’m not gonna lie. I had no idea that was a thing. Does that make me a Terry? Yeah that’s the male equivalent of a Karen and I wasn’t about to research that one any further since my head most certainly would’ve exploded in the doing.

Turns out, Karen has a history. And I’ll refrain from making a snide remark about my own personal Vietnam of a relationship with a woman of the same name. Oh shit, too late! Anyways, the current pejorative is basically an (comm)ode to anyone who specializes in wasting someone else’s time and then makes a federal case out of it. It’s a toot to the bittersweet, a chupa to the cabra . . a laming of the shrew.

The term has become synonymous with drama mamas who insist on talking to a manager and bullying health-care workers and preventing neighbors they never knew existed from entering their apartment building and coughing on strangers and having Target tantrums and otherwise boring us with their inalienable right to be really fucking annoying.  It would, however, take several iterations before “Karen” came to achieve Instagram infamy. Wanna take a quick trip down mercury lane? N’kay . . .

Miss Ann– This term was used in the Jim Crow era. Black people would refer to white people who used their privilege as ‘Miss Ann’. If you ask me, this one would’ve made a really shitty hashtag. Miss Ann sounds like a nanny, or an elementary school teacher. And a virgin at that. Nah.

Barbecue Becky– The term “Becky” was born in the 1992 hip-hop classic Baby Got Back. And it might have stood the test of time if someone hadn’t added Barbecue to it along the way. After which it sounds like something you’d find in the American Girl Doll catalogue.

Cornerstore Caroline– I’m pretty sure this was the name of the bakery run by the final winner of “Cupcake Wars”. Not that I . . uh, ever watched that stupid show.

Permit Patty– Wait, I thought this was Peppermint Patty’s fun loving sister. The one who was written off the show after sleeping with Snoopy.

It was rumored that the 2019 tropical storm Karen possessed hidden meaning, mostly because it was hilarious to assume such a thing. I’m of the belief it was a crazy coincidence, and I’m fairly certain that if the meteorologist who named the storm had been reached for comment, he would have re-iterated as much to the media . . and his ex-wife’s lawyers.

And if you haven’t been sufficiently turned off by the idea that mean people everywhere have successfully  commandeered a common God given name, look whose bob the meme-ologists have decided to pin “Karen” to.

Kate Gosselin Old Hair | Blog Pendidikan

I don’t know about you, but if my name was Karen, I’d be furious at the thought that they’re profiling my ass with Justin Bieber head shots.

Rest assured, the derogatory nature of the term has its fair share of critics. Like for instance, anyone whose name is actually Karen. And anyone who happens to be married to someone whose name is actually Karen. And the Dalai Lama, him too.

Is any of this fair to all the Karens out there who are just trying to live their best lives without feeling the need to resort to using college nicknames when in public? Of course it isn’t. But society has always operated on a whim and a plier, so there’s that. Alls I know is that if some guy named Marc goes viral after pitching a hissy fit in a Whole Foods because his Prime account ain’t being recognized, I’m changing my name. I’ll go with something that is antonymous to controversy of any kind.

Geraldo . . yeah, that’s it.

 

 

 

 

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42 thoughts on “Sticks And Stones Ain’t Got Nothing On This

  1. I got in a Twitter feud yesterday with a woman who didn’t like my views on racism in America. I ended up calling her Karen at the end of the “debate.” It wasn’t exactly right, but it was the closest I could come to putting her in her place for her histrionics.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Terry? Hmm, I’d have figured it would have been “Brad.” Nice musical selection as the cherry on top of this whole phenom. And to think I came really close to naming my daughter Karen but who is much closer to Meredith Brooks’ song but definitely NEVER a Karen. 😇 The girl is so relevant!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Yeah anyway! Whatever happened to Brad? I know there was a movement back in the aughts, but it went nowhere. Probably because social media wasn’t yet social media . . .

      I dig the name Karen just fine and believe it or not, I don’t think about what most people do when the name comes up.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This is just more proof of how incredibly low the IQ of some people can actually be. We all have brains but some people have never learned how to use them and prove it continually. The vile, cowardly actions of a few imbeciles can, unfortunately, have lasting ramifications. I want to hurt them.

    Liked by 1 person

  4. B,

    I have to tell you I love how you kill time and how your twisted brain works. Between that and your falling down the YouTube rabbit hole… who’d-a thunk you could get such a post?

    Terry? Just doesn’t have the same ring as Karen. Mind you, I really do feel for the honest Karens – the not-annoying, bitchy, mouthy, pushy broads that have taken over the internets.

    I can’t help but think of a former friend whose official name was Caroline but whose father wanted the name Karen so he called her that anyway. She is so not a “Karen”.

    Now if it was a tropical storm that has started all this, that is rather interesting… still not fair to the normal Karens out there, but that is the way it goes nowadays.

    Hey… isn’t that picture whatshername that used to have a TV show? She left such an impression on me, I’ve completely forgotten her name.

    Excellent choice of song!

    Q

    Liked by 1 person

    • Q

      I find it fascinating. Well, incredibly interesting anyway, how certain individuals Karenize themselves. And in the moment, they really don’t give a flip. Even though they have to know this is going to make them infamous.

      You mean the overwhelming majority who now must go by the abbreviated K? Yeah, I feel for them as well. And no, Terry has no oomph.

      Oh sweet Caroline. See what I did there?

      I have to wonder if the person who named the storm did it as a joke.

      Kate. Yes. She left quite an impression on me as well. Ugh.

      Gracias!

      B

      Liked by 1 person

  5. So this is why I’ve preferred my given name Rebecca to my nickname Becky since I left college. Although I wasn’t aware of the Barbecue Becky/Baby Got Back references until now (thank you SO MUCH for enlightening me), I already knew from years of experience that any reference to a Becky in popular culture and music wasn’t gonna be good, she usually being a victim or rape or some other sort of violence or misfortune. So glad my middle name isn’t Karen!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I know a few Karens, one of which I could see going viral. And I also know a few peeps who could be “Karenized”. But alas, I’m hoping Marc never does something that warrants the viral venting.

      Like

  6. this was so well done- of course the sorryless humor was layered well/ but there is also a seriousness to this – connecting to the research you did (and serious dude, i so wondered about the name Karen and it’s current use so i feel in the know)
    and the other names too.
    reminds me how language morphs and evolves and sometimes these names that represent a “type” are needed because it helps us cope!

    and as you said geraldo – can be bad for the person that has the name

    Liked by 1 person

    • Thank ye Prior, thank ye very much for that. And yes, there is a serious aspect to this, namely that peeps are going crazy. And not the good kind of crazy.

      Language is such a fascinating thing. To imagine this name was chosen . . like, that always gets me. How does it become a thing?

      Yeah, you think?

      Liked by 1 person

    • I dedicated this to that personal Vietnam of a relationship from the aughts of 2000. I didn’t tell HER that, of course, seeing as how it’s best to steer clear of the woman for like . . the rest of my life.

      Liked by 1 person

    • Welp, if you and yours need a place to shack up when the shit hits the fan, me, John and Dale are going to be forming a badass group and heading for Montana. We’ll have the most kickass compound going and vicious poets are always welcome. 😉

      Liked by 1 person

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